The Ocean.......

Have you ever just sat by the ocean and done nothing? If you know me at all, you would know that it is one of my favorite things to do. I can sit and do absolutely nothing but stare at the ocean for hours. There is just something about the sound of the waves crashing on the sand and being able to close your eyes and listen to the soothing sound that is just so relaxing to me. It is a stress free zone for me, which is really hard for me to find these days.

It has been almost 2 years since I have been able to sit on "my beach" here in New Zealand and just relax. I spent 6 hours there today just "catching up." I climbed one of the mountains/cliffs over looking the ocean and that took about an hour. If you keeping hiking you get to a private beach that is covered in white sand and penguins like to hang out there occasionally. At least they used too a couple of years ago. It's absolutely amazing and well worth the treacherous hike. I didn't quite make it that far because I had the brilliant idea of hiking with flip-flops on and I kept getting stuck in the mud....literally! After almost losing my footing a couple of times and knowing that the edge of the cliff was to close for comfort I decided to find a bench and stay perched for awhile.

I walked away today feeling rested and at peace.....which is something I have not felt since the day I found out I was pregnant. The constant turmoil that has been present for the past 2 years stopped and I actually felt at peace. I found myself being able to pray for the first time in only God knows how long. I have a bad habit of bottling things up and keeping all my emotions inside until I blow up.....and usually end up slamming cupboards, doors or something that makes a loud noise. Today, I was able to let everything out.....and dumped it into the ocean. No loud noises, no cupboards.....just sitting and praying and asking that God just take away the burdens I have been trying to carry by myself for so long. When I'm by the ocean I can't help but do that. Now, I just need to find a way to bring the peace I've found.....and a bit of the ocean back with me to NY. If you have any ideas let me know. :)